I've been trying to learn how to run using Couch-to-5k. I was so skeptical when I began the program. I've never been able to jog at all; my asthma is too severe. The first day I went jogging, I couldn't finish all of the 30-second jogging cycles. Yet somehow I convinced myself to keep going with this program. After all, it's worked for tons of people. I can watch the #c25k hashtag on Twitter to see people at various levels of the program. Awesomely enough, it has been working for me, too.
That said, I've been 'stuck' in week 7 for about three weeks now because of some health problems, but I've also been amazed because each time I go to jog, I'm able to pick up where I left off. True, it's not perfect -- because I haven't been working out as regularly, I've lost a lot of time off of my pace -- but I'm still able to keep going for the same length of time. I've learned to regulate my pace so my asthma doesn't stop me. I never even knew that was possible until I started trying.
In some ways, it's strange to see how I am like all the other people C25K worked for. Aren't I an individual? Don't I have asthma and other unique factors that make running difficult? In other ways, I still feel a tension and resistance in my thoughts. There are days when I think that I don't need to do something a certain way. Even this morning, I told myself I wouldn't jog the full 25 minutes because I needed to ease into jogging again. I kept saying, "After this song, I'll walk." But the song would end, and I'd keep jogging along. Sometimes, it's about trusting that C25K says I'm ready to do something. I need that on the days when I feel uncertain. Yet, those days are becoming less common. As I keep going through the steps in C25K, I'm learning to trust it less and trust myself more.
It's a process. It's only half about the jogging.
No comments:
Post a Comment